Warning Signs

The last few days have been great. I have stayed within my eating plan, and have accomplished a few personal tasks. Again, thank you for your support!

I stated at the beginning of this blog that I wanted to be honest write about the good, the bad, and the ugly. As I look back I have covered a lot of that, though I have had a tug on my stomach off and on. I woke up this morning after a bunch of horrible and weird dreams, realizing that I have a little fear going on. The following may seem jumbled and busy, but I have to process.

My husband just a few months ago had both of his knees replaced. Previous to that he has had chronic pain for 2-3 years concerning his knees. He has had to be on a lot of medicine over that time and some even stronger meds since the surgery. He is doing an amazing job of recovering and we have learned after thinking he may never work again, that he can indeed work again. Huge relief! We still have a few challenges to face and I'm not looking forward that that at all! In fact I would love to just bury my head in the sand and ignore the elephant in the room, but that would put both of us at risk for future problems.

Also, as you know, I have my hands in a lot of pots. A college age ministry, the Alano Club and a pretty busy work schedule, all of which I love and have a lot of passion about. I feel so blessed everyday to be one of the few people who get to do what they love for a living, and to feel passion everyday for God, and both groups I'm involved in. That being said, there is sometimes a lot of stress, good and bad, that comes with all three. We are getting ready to move into the new Alano Club building this weekend. This after months of being in construction trailers and using portapots. We have made lots of good memories in those trailers and those of us who have been there through the whole transition of the group splitting, then the construction, and now the new building, some stressful memories also. Now as we get ready to put history in its place and start anew, it is a relief and we are BUSY! That coupled with the events Axis has planned and my commitments to that ministry, then add my job being at it's busiest ever, much less with the holidays approaching, I am feeling a little overwhelmed. That I usually can handle on it's own, but now.....the holiday goodies start rolling in. Of all that I have just listed, and all the reasons I have to be overwhelmed, that is the one thing that scares me the most. I have shared with my clients what I'm trying to do with this healthy food thing, but so many of them give goodies for Christmas. I think I'll be good for Thanksgiving but Christmas scares me! I almost wish I could just go into a eating disorder treatment center for the holidays, like the girl did on Dr. Ozz last night.

My request is a prayer request, that God will keep me focused on the causes I'm involved in, and keep me healthy through the holidays, physically, emotionally, and spiritually. I am happiest when I'm giving to others, so my personal goal is to stay busy helping others and spending time with family through the holidays. Please pray with me that I don't choose escape. It is ok to take a day, but escaping is a dangerous place for me. If I fall off the radar, please check in with me. Sometimes I attempt escape and don't even realize it until I am so closed off emotionally that I'm almost numb. I don't want to be in that place. I need to be busy, involved, and helping others or my soul gets sick and isolated, even in a crowded room. God bless!